Category Archives: words

Apology Accepted

If you’re like me, and I know I am, there have been several times in my life when I wanted to and needed to apologize. (An incident or two may have even occurred during these last three months of quarantine!)

But apologies are tricky. Most of us haven’t really progressed that far from the mumbled “I’m sorry” left over from childhood. And the “I’m sorry you feel that way” approach sounds like a very civilized way of making you wrong for your feelings. It’s about as satisfying as being handed a cold dead fish.

So how do you apologize in a way that your listener can really hear what you are saying?

This is the time when you put the other person first. Your part in this situation will come in later.

First of all, acknowledge the other person’s feelings. Do NOT paraphrase. Use their words. Say something like “it doesn’t feel very good to be ignored” or “embarrassed” or whatever it is your listener is upset about. Be sure to use the word that he or she used in describing their feelings.

Then, make a simple statement. This is where you say “I’m sorry that happened”. You can also add “I never intended for you to feel that way,” or “that’s not the message I was trying to send”.

Resist the urge to explain yourself. A good thing to remember is that a real apology does not, come with a“but”.

This is the time where you can make some suggestions or give your listener an idea of steps that you could take to prevent situations like this from happening again.

It’s never really easy to admit that you made a mistake. But as soon as you realize that there might be a problem, the quicker sooner you address it the better.

If you follow these simple steps, you have done everything you can to make the situation better. Also, if this feels like too much work for you, take some time because you are not really ready to apologize.

Self-Talk – Change Your Mind, Change Your Life

Change Your Mind, Change Your Life This month’s article is going to be about self-talk. What a coincidence!  Now, I don’t know about you, but this Covid-19 quarantine has got me talking to myself a lot more than usual! If you’re new to the idea of self-talk, self-talk refers to the ongoing dialogue that most… Continue Reading


So what’s all this stuff about gratitude? Having a gratitude journal is nothing new. Many people have been recommending it for years. But I think the sticking point for me has been the actual word “gratitude”. As you may have heard before, words create pictures in our minds. And for me they create unspoken sentences.… Continue Reading

Are You Sending The Wrong Mental Message?

If you’ve been reading our newsletter, you probably already think “outside the box”. And since this is the holiday season with lots of parties and celebrations on the horizon, here is an amazing “outside the box” idea for you! First, here’s a little background. When Bill and I were teaching classes, we took the participants… Continue Reading

Creating Your Desired Outcomes

Between this new moon and next month’s new moon there will be get-togethers with family and friends. Some we may be looking forward to, and there may be some get-togethers that we are not. So, here is something interesting you can try for yourself. When Bill and I were traveling and teaching, we always set… Continue Reading

Are you psychic? Of course you are! – Part 1

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Men are Not Just Hairy Women with Bad Manners

“Men are not just hairy women with bad manners”, says, author Allison Armstrong. And she’s right! That’s one of the biggest mistakes that women make. Initially, we are attracted to and enjoy the obvious differences between men and women! But as the relationship progresses, we are notorious for expecting men to do and think as… Continue Reading